All the Single Ladies (and Gentlemen)
“So, what’s been going on in your life lately?” I asked my friend after dinner one night. I tucked my leg beneath me on the couch, swooped a wild strand of unwashed hair behind my ear, and waited to hear about her exciting new job. Instead, she sighed.
“Oh, you know, just wanting this.” She nodded at my husband cleaning dishes in the kitchen, then gestured to my daughter wandering aimlessly around the living room. I’ve heard dreams of marriage and a family echo from other women’s mouths, and my husband has bent an ear to men with the same message. But it never seems to get easier to hear.
Humor me here, and think about a friend of yours who is single. (No, seriously, take some time to really think about this person.) Is he or she completely worthless? Of no value? A total disgrace to humanity? My guess is that, no, they aren’t. In fact, they’re probably pretty frickin’ awesome. But there’s some phantom-like stigma hovering over our society, claiming that single people are less valuable than those who are married with a family. There’s an unspoken message that single people must have something wrong with them – something utterly unlovable – or else they would be married already.
Like the person you may have just been thinking about, however, our friends facing these struggles are some of the most brilliant, compassionate, and thoughtful people we have ever come across; and yet, they have been convinced they aren’t enough. Not on their own, anyway. Somewhere along the line, we’ve been conditioned to believe we’re worth more when we have someone else – even if that person treats us like we’re worthless.
The truth, however, is radical:
You are more like Liam Neeson than you may have thought.
Like his character in Taken, you have a very specific set of skills. Maybe your skills aren’t focused on tracking people down and exacting vengeance, but that’s okay, we’ll leave that to Liam. His skills are specific to him; yours are specific to you. In addition to all those strengths, you also have a very specific set of passions, dreams, goals, and opportunities. Because of this unique mixture that makes you who you are, you are valuable. You are lovable. You are loved.
What does the package of “you” look like? What gets you excited, fired up, or even angry? And how can you live out those passions on the daily? After all, you may not be able to control when you will meet Miss Right or Prince Charming, but you CAN choose to change the world. Every single day.
So, how is the single life helping you impact the world today?